The Lord is My Light and Salvation
Where does Psalm 27:1 (pictured) fit in when everything falls apart?
Not that. Please God, no.
It’s the unmistakable pain of heartbreak.
I can’t believe I’m here.
The disappointment. The heartache. The shame.
Devastation.
Questions.
Why, God?
Didn’t I do enough to avoid this?
Didn’t I work hard enough?
Don’t You love me enough?
Miscarriage, rejection, divorce, death. It’s the moment you realize it’s really happening, that steals your breath away.
How many walls have been built in these moments?
I’ve thought these thoughts, built these walls.
When I had my fifth miscarriage, my perspective shifted. No longer trusting in Jesus for the outcome I wanted, my heart hardened—devastatingly—towards Him.
I remember thinking to myself, "I trusted Him and He didn’t protect me, so I’ll be doing it differently next time..."
"I did my part, Lord, what more do You want from me?"
"You won’t give me answers, so why would I bother asking?"
It may not be miscarriage for you. It may be relationship breakdown, health, finance, or even that goal you’ve been working towards for what seems like forever.
When it comes crashing down, how do we respond? Will we continue to trust Jesus, or will we lean into the belief that we must protect ourselves from Him?
Sister, we must not forget the most beautiful truth in the midst of our disappointments, heartache, and suffering is that Christ alone is our light and salvation. He is the strength of our life. He is the Good Shepherd. The One who goes before an remains with us.
Let the truths of Psalm 27:1 (pictured) and Romans 8:31 sink in today: “If God is for us, who can be against us?” (ESV)
Has a wall been built up between you and the Lord in your heart? If so, I encourage you to spend time in prayer, asking God to reveal and remove or grant you the strength to remove the things that are getting in the way.
As you do so, I pray the walls would be torn down and that you would experience His lasting nearness, comfort, and peace.
Meet the Author
Joni Boyd
Joni lives in Sydney, Australia with her three grown kids and husband of two years, Nathan.
After being divorced several years ago, Joni is grateful for the healing God has since done in her family and in herself. While she never expected to be divorced or remarried, this season is a precious gift from God and she is grateful for all of it.
Joni is passionate about encouraging women to go deeper with Jesus - so they would know that while life may not be as smooth as we’d like, Jesus is not afraid of the mess, nor does He lack the power to heal and transform.
