7 Steps to Overcoming Self-Doubt

Have you ever struggled with self-doubt or comparison?Me too.The times in my life when I’ve struggled with self-doubt the most have been the times when I’ve been comparing myself to other people. There’s nothing like comparison to keep us feeling stuck, incapable, and unworthy. We start to look at other people’s lives and in doing so, we take our focus off of our own. Then we get trapped in the cycle of feeling “behind” in our lives or “not good enough” because our lives aren’t going the way we think they should based on what we’re seeing in other people’s lives.One of the scariest things about comparison is that it can lead us to not only feel frustrated with our lives, but to actually doubt ourselves and to even doubt God. Comparison causes us to ask questions like, “Why don’t I have what she has?” “Why can’t I be happy like she is?” “Why can’t I have an amazing job/ministry/husband/whatever like she does?” “Is there something wrong with me?” “Am I doing it all wrong?”When we compare ourselves to others and begin to entertain self-doubts, we move farther and farther away from living the beautiful and unique purpose and calling God has for us. We no longer dwell in the safety of God’s peace, joy, and contentedness, and we begin to live in daily fears, doubts, frustration, and ingratitude.We doubt who we are and the amazing person we were created to be.We doubt our personalities, gifts, callings, and even our relationship with God.We doubt our Heavenly Father Himself, and we wonder why He’s not blessing us the way we think He should.If you’re struggling with comparison and it’s making you doubt yourself and feel frustrated with God, first of all, please know that you’re not alone. We all struggle with this from time to time. In fact, comparison and self-doubt are two of the enemy’s favorite tactics to keep us from fulfilling our divine purpose and calling.If you’re so ready to get back on track and start loving yourself, your life, and your relationship with God again, then here are a few steps you can take to start moving forward:1. Make yourself aware of the times you struggle most. Is it while you’re on social media, or perhaps hanging out with certain friends?2. Make yourself aware of the area(s) you feel insecure in. Is it your personality or appearance? Maybe your job or in your role as a mom?3. Spend some quiet time sitting in silence and thinking about what’s bringing up those fears and doubts for you. Is it something external going on (like a friend who enjoys tearing others down) or something internal (like Satan attacking your thoughts?)4. Pray over your situation! Ask God for wisdom to see exactly what’s going on and for help to overcome your doubts and fears.5. Spend time reading Scriptures and studying who you are as God’s child. Psalm 139 is a great place to start!6. Begin to ask God to show you how unique you are and to reveal to you the special calling He has for you right now. Then, start to thank God for who He has made you to be; focus on your own unique points, and thank Him for each one!7. Prayerfully take steps toward where you want to be. After your time with the Lord, if He’s shown you areas where you can grow or changes you can make, start making them. Instead of comparing yourself to others, compare yourself to the person God is calling you to be.Bonus Tip: When you admire a sister in Christ, don’t allow that admiration to transition into comparison or jealousy. Instead, allow that admiration to inspire you in your own life and faith! For example, if you wonder how one of your Christian friends always seems to stay calm and positive, even during hard times, ask her how she does it instead of silently wishing you could be that way. She may share some helpful ideas that could spark growth in your faith, and you never know, she may even share that she isn’t perfect and that she struggles from time to time just like you do! Instead of envying her faith, you can be encouraged by it, and by opening up to her, you’re also opening yourself up to the opportunity of having a close friend that you can talk to and relate to instead of being jealous of her or feeling inferior around her.I hope these steps are helpful! Please don’t allow self-doubt to take root in your mind or heart, my friend. I’ve been there, and it’s not a good place to be. I lovingly encourage you to take your eyes off of others and put them back on Christ. Listen to His voice and hear from Him just how much He loves you and how uniquely He created you to be, and how uniquely He’s calling your journey to be as well.

About the Author

Abigail Folds

Abigail is an internationally trained and qualified life coach on a mission to encourage and inspire women to live the lives they’re being called to live.  I believe we are each on this earth for a reason, and I LOVE helping other women realize and own that truth so that they can reach their God-given potential in all areas of life.You can find her website here and Instagram here.